The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows
Life ain't all sunshine and rainbows. There's plenty of storms during our journey and a lot of times things don't go the way we want them to go. It's true, that many times we just perceive things as bad, but they aren't really bad: The problems are created in our heads. Those are the easiest to solve, as we usually just need someone to open our eyes and realize how wrong we were. But there are real problems that all of us face at certain points in our lives: Tragedies like deaths, disease, break-ups, accidents, abuses... We can't just brush off these things as if they were merely created in our heads. No, these are times of trial and we have no choice: We have to deal with these issues. And no matter what - we have to be strong. We have to keep going. Never give up! We get wounded and we need time to make these wounds heal. But they will heal. We just need to believe in ourselves. There will be scars, but the wounds won't be open anymore. At one point our last tear of sadness will dry and the first tear of joy will pour down our cheek and we will smile again. Please don't forget that there's light at the end of the tunnel. I always think: If you're hurt and you wanna cry - cry! If you need to talk - talk! Just let it out. And if in the past you were there for those who needed you, they will be there for you now, when you need them.
This year was a year of change for me: I had death in the family, a break up and friendships that faded. It was a confusing time full of highs and lows, I was lost during most of this year. I saw everything as negative, mostly because I wanted to. But now this time is certainly over. I'm positive, hopeful and a changed man. It was some 4 months ago, during my emo phase, when I wrote a post about my misfortune this year. It was bad back then, yes, but now it doesn't matter anymore. I'm back on track. I have my scars, but they don't matter now. I'm just looking ahead to the future: I'm focusing on my hopes, dreams and aspirations. I'm most positive that they will come true. I will write more about my own pursuit of happiness in the weeks and months to come. But let's close this post with Rocky Balboa (played by Sylvester Stallone) and his quote from the film in 2006, that inspired my post:
[...] The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows. It's a very mean and nasty place and I don't care how tough you are it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain't about how hard ya hit. It's about how hard you can get it and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward. [...]
How true, right? Do you have scars and how do you deal with hardships?
*I just wrote this post to all people who struggle currently. Never give up!
[Photo: Source][quote from Rocky]
19 KAFKAESQUE COMMENTS:
I think my 'worst year' would be in my final med year, last year. It was stressful, yeah, that's normal for everyone. But there were other things going on back home while I was away. My grandfather had a stroke and there was death in the family too. I wouldn't know what to do if it hadn't been for God, my housemates and family (on voip). But I managed to get through the dark moments... :)
November 25, 2009 4:00 AM
@Icedteamonster: Glad you made it thru that year, it was really a tough time, I can relate a bit. And thank you for your comment :)
November 25, 2009 4:24 AM
My kinda hard youth (with my parents fighting, then my dad leaving the house, then leaving the country, and my mom taking care of me and my bro) has turned me into some kind of power girl :P
no seriously, it really made me stronger, so I can deal with hardships super easily. I just face it and go! sometimes I feel like I'm too strong, and trying to be brave too hard... at least, that's what Boyfriend tells me...
loves
November 25, 2009 6:02 AM
@Shirley: We have some similarities regarding the youth. It definitely strengthened us. I can relate to that. I'm sure you're a strong woman, I get that feeling when I read your posts :)
November 25, 2009 6:51 AM
I am in the middle of a storm right now...sigh...
November 25, 2009 8:06 AM
i lost 2 ppl i love deeply this year, 2 food poisonings, health deteriorated, career - bland.
painful, yes.
pessimistic, yes.
feel like the world's unluckiest person, yes.
but like u said, we all got through it. feel like crying - cry, feel like talking - talk!
its all part and parcel of life, what can't kill u make u stronger :)
i wish the best for u Nino :)
November 25, 2009 9:41 AM
When my dad passed away a few years ago, my whole world came crashing down on me. So far, this was the worst moment I had encountered. My heart is broken but I learned to live with the pain. Nothing is the same without him... But I don't look back. I move forward and I keep in mind the good memories.
The more hardships you go through, the stronger you become because you have to overcome it. You can be victorious in your hardship and like my dad used to say, it won’t rain all the time and the sky won’t fall forever. At the end of the day even though it has been pouring hard, there will always be a rainbow that will help you pull through the bad weather.
November 25, 2009 4:23 PM
@Kelvin: Wish you good luck!
@Sharon: Well, I thought of you when writing this post. I know you've been through a lot. Really wish that 2010 will be a happy year for you (and me, too), hehe.
@Angele: Wow, you really had some tough times and I must say, I admire your strength and perseverance. Thank you for your great comment, you put it so well, I couldn't say it better.
November 25, 2009 5:26 PM
Bumps and roller coasters of emotion and experience, happen throughout our lives. We learn different strategies for coping and handling the the storms and difficulties when they arise. It is part and parcel of developing inner strength.
November 25, 2009 8:10 PM
i feel so bad when i read this post, coz there's so much that i take for granted.
because now that i think about it, i've had my own bad times and difficulties, but never tragedies like you say.
no deaths, no tragic diseases.
as for accidents, i got hit by a bus once, and i didn't have a scratch >_< i know, so unbelieveable, but it's true
i was always the one who did the breaking up.
and no abuse (although i had a narrow escape from this psycho bastard who stalked me and tried to beat me up when i was at uni >_< )
i guess i am blessed and should be more grateful.
*passing on some of the good karma to you guys* so that you all have a good 2010 :)
November 25, 2009 8:43 PM
I love this post, bro!
My scars carved this year also, and I'm so glad that I have found a wonderful friend like you. Thanks for being there for me when I needed someone to talk to the most.
XOXO!!
November 25, 2009 9:57 PM
Too much to tell, but too little space for it.
But I like this, IF YOU NEED TO TALK - TALK! :D
November 25, 2009 10:19 PM
No deaths of anyone really close to me recently...but I am in a quarter life crisis now...with old friends gone and difficulties making new ones (offline). And for the fact I have no idea on which direction I should take in life now, for the first time.
Anyways, I shouldn't complain; after all I do have a job during these tough times...and I have you people.
November 25, 2009 11:26 PM
@ZACL: Good comment. Thanks.
@Manju: Well, it's not like bad things have to happen to everyone, but they usually do, to some sooner, to some later... Cherish what you have, yep. And thanks for your good karma :D
@Selvy: You are most welcome :D
@Stefanie: Yes, yes.. It's an issues where we could talk for hours :)
@The Envoy: Well, we all come to points in life like you. I may not know you in real, but you have a buddy online. I really appreciate your comments and I like your character. You're a nice guy. I'm sure things will be fine for you and you'll eventually have the life you wish ;) Good luck.
November 26, 2009 1:00 AM
i have this one scar that bleeds love.
November 26, 2009 6:03 AM
@Ejean: I know -_-
November 26, 2009 7:05 AM
I do have scars and yes, you're right, life isn't all sunshine and rainbows. However, I do try to look at every negative aspect as a learning experience. I went through a rather traumatic break up of a relationship of 2 years a couple of years ago and no matter how sad I was that it didn't work out as I hoped it would, I knew that if the guy didn't show his true colors in the end and made me reconsider being in a committed relationship with him, I would've been stuck with his deceits for who knows how long. Not to mention he was there less for me then my friends were. Thanks to him, I understood that relationships don't always make you happy. Sometimes it can be otherwise, and there's no need to be so vulnerable to something that isn't guaranteed to give you that emotional satisfaction that you so often see in romantic movies. Sometimes, friendship is even deeper and less shallower then romantic relationships. So in the end, I got the guts to dump him even though I was reluctant at first and I finally breath a sigh of relief once I've gotten rid of him. At least I managed to get rid of someone who was never worth keeping around and did me more bad then good. I no longer had to waste my time crying over him nor waste the emotional pain that came with the relationship. I was finally happy.
Same goes for friendships that faded away. I had so many "best friends" whom I thought would always stay by my side in the past. Didn't turn out that way. Once high school was over, my so-called best friend made no attempt to stay in touch with me, despite the fact that I continuously tried to call her. After a year of ignoring me, she had the audacity to suddenly call me out of the blue and asked me for a favor. That's when I realized maybe it was for the better to let our friendship die. She was never a true friend to begin with, why waste my time trying to keep her around when she doesn't even want to be around me? Sure, I was angry at first. But after realizing the important lesson I learned from this, I also realized that by having some friendships fade away, it would be easier to spot who the real friend is. Currently, I have three closest friends whom I've known since I was 12 and they haven't left my side yet. But before letting my friendship with my ex-best friend die, I didn't know that these three were the "friends in need." By allowing some friendships to fade away, it was easier to spot the true friends from the fake friends. So instead of being angry at my ex-best friend, I thanked her instead.
Even when it came to the death of a friend or family member, the most sensitive topic to talk about, I did learn something from such an event, no matter how heart-wrenching it is when I think about it. It is very hurtful to have someone so close to you suddenly pass away. All of a sudden, you start to think about how you could've spent more time with that person or how if you only knew they would be gone, you would've said some words to them that you held back for so long, words that express your deep love and respect for them. Unfortunately, you can't rewind time to go back and do those things. So you can only look forward, to the future. Even though you can't spend more time with the one who passed away, you still have time left in life to spend with the others who you also care a lot for. The ones that are still alive. You now know you can no longer take for granted the people who mean the most to you and you're now aware that they won't always stick around. All you can do is make the most out of the time spent with them so that when it's time for them to leave or time for you to leave, you won't have any regrets.
November 26, 2009 1:15 PM
Everyone has their fair share of good and bad times.
I have my fair share of bad memories. The truth is that they will never be forgotten.
What I can do is to add more pleasant memories in my life now so that inch by inch, I will have less reason to think about the unhappier ones.
November 26, 2009 2:35 PM
@Van: Wow, thank you for your long comment. I enjoyed reading it and got to know a lot about you. You were right in all the aspects: Thank you!~~
@Shingo T: I agree :)
November 26, 2009 4:19 PM
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