Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Why am I anonymous?

Last time one blogger asked me who I was. I said check my blog. After she did, she said I was very anonymous. Well, she's right. I used to be less anonymous in the past, be it on my blog or be it on Twitter. In my old blog I never put up photos of me or people close to me, because I am just a careful person. I'm always thinking that while the internet is full of nice people that I want to get to know, read their blogs, share their views, there's some sick assholes as well. And I don't mean those who comment and say "you're an asshole" or those who spam on your blog, no. I mean the ones who are employed by governments of states like Iran, North Korea and China. They are the ones who don't give a damn about freedom of speech. Basically I don't give a damn if my blog is on some Iranian or Chinese black list (I'm sure it is), but if one day I accidentaly fall from a roof or get hit by a car or shot by someone while I travel the world, well, that wouldn't be something I'd like to experience. And you never know, because it's a mad mad world out there. I may never travel to Iran or live there, but the rest of Asia, I never know. But at the same time, I want to say (I mean blog) what's on my mind, I don't want to censor myself.

And there's another reason why I always strived to be anonymous as much as possible. It's incidents like the one, when a so called celeb-blogger picks someone out from the crowd of those who don't like her and slams him to the bone with her horde of angry followers, who think her behavior is ok and they basically try to find everything you ever posted online just to bash you or to humiliate you more. I realized that it's better not to engage with them under any circumstances, because you can't debate morons. You're wasting your time. Even if you're a mere bystander, you're a target. Well, these were lessons learned for the future.

And now I'd like to share a list of my 'controversial' posts with you that I made thru the year. I mean it's ridiculous when I think what some people get upset about, because for me it's really nothing, but some people take themselves so seriously. Here's the list:

  1. Maybe my 1st controversial post was Jackie Chan disappointed me, when I started to write about what bothers me regarding China and the way their government restricts all sorts of freedoms and Jackie Chan even commended them for that. That made me angry, I wrote about it and I was surprised when I saw that the infamous Chinabounder left a comment on the post. The other controversial one would be We won't forget Tiananmen '89 我們不會忘記六四事件. Stuff like that probably blocked my blog in China. But I just want to say what's on my mind, that's why I had to write it.
  2. Posts about beautiful women like Incredible Wang Ruo Yi made some people label me as being sick and having an Asian fetish. I mean, I've seen whole blogs dedicated to all things Asian or all things Japan, where grown up guys post photos of manga figurines and gravure models. I only write about Asian beauties sometimes and I still think I'm within the normal-label. I am not obsessed with anything, I don't have an Asian-fetish, but I like aesthetic photos of gorgeous Asian and other women.
  3. Sometimes I write posts about religion. I am an atheist myself and I am very critical of religion(s). If your religion is personal, I have no problem with you. If you say one thing and do another, you're a hypocrite and your religion is only a disguise and excuse for you. I also criticised the Pope in this post: Pope decomposed in 3 steps. I think religion should and must be open to criticism. But I do have many friends who are religious and I can happily coexist with them.
  4. I write about Germany and I can be harsh and critical. In Europe, Germany is the most populated country and the biggest economy. And with its sad past, it has a unique standing in Europe and the world. I myself am fluent in German and I also follow German politics and everything that happens there. Two posts, that may seem controversial to some: Germans always want to be number 1 was less controversial. The one that offended some Germans (read comments) was this post: How do Germans feel on D-Day? I guess it's very easy to offend Germans: criticize them or their country and they're already offended.
  5. I wrote a lot about Iran in the time of the post election ruckus. That was the first time that I got a lot of feedback, mostly positive, but few very nasty (calling me names) and I didn't publish their comments. I usually don't censor, but I don't publish spam and insults. I mean insults with no explanaition. If you tell me I'm an asshole and give a good explanation, I will publish and try to defend myself. Plain insults are just boring. Here are the posts that sparked minor controversies: Elections in Iran are worth a sack of potatoes, Iran: Real apathy or fake sympathy? and the one post, that really pissed off a German guy, who defended the Iranian regime: Travel to Iran.
  6. I am a very international guy and I had my share of travel and interracial relationships, that's why I like to write about race-relations and racism. I realized that these days people are throwing the racist card very easily. I hate being labeled a racist, especially because I am so anti-racist and strive for racial and human equality. My post Are Asian women really attracted to Western men wasn't really controversial, but I got a lot of feedback and I saw similar posts on other blogs that sparked some controversy. This is just ridiculous: People should understand the difference between personal preference (taste) and thinking one race is superior to another. It's a huge difference!
  7. So far the post that sparked the biggest anger and most offensive comments (and you wouldn't believe how ridiculous that is, when I tell you that it's the post with the title...) Dawn Yang, best Singaporean blogger! I wrote that post around the time of a minor uproar in the blogosphere, and after I defended the defamed blogger in some previous posts, so many angry supporters of a certain blogger let out their anger on my blog and especially on Dawn Yang - basically bashing her in long essay-like posts that I never published. Or they just trashed me. Well, I could've easily had like 70 comments under that post. Until now I don't understand how some people can get so nasty and angry over some things someone writes in the blog; over opinion, over personal preference. Because of that, they want to hack all your accounts, trash you, your friends (even family). It's ridiculous. That's the time when I learned that I have to become even more anonymous than I already was. I deleted a lot of stuff and made a clear cut from the past and started this blog. But I am well aware that there's no 100% anonymity online. They'll find me one day, but I don't care.
Well, I'm only blogging for something over a year now, but I want to blog for a long time. I learned a lot in very short time and that's why I decided to be anonymous as much as possible. However, if you'd go thru all my posts, you'd probably find a lot of info about who I am, where I am from, maybe even my name. It's not like I wanna be perfectly anonymous, I'm just a little cautious, that's all. (I know Google knows everything!) I have to say, that I met many nice bloggers online and I added them to Facebook or Twitter, where they could get to know me better and even see some pics of me. That's why, if I feel I can trust you, I'll add you with no hesitation. But trust has to be built, especially when you know about the dangers that are out there... in the blogosphere and beyond.

And now tell me, did you ever write something controversial? Did you ever delete comments or posts? Explain why and tell me about your experiences with anonymity and online controversies. Thanx.

[Cartoon modified by me, originally by Adam Zyglis]

30 KAFKAESQUE COMMENTS:

Nashe^ said...

Oh well. There will always be people who can't distinguish between fact and opinion. Shan't say more.

I keep my Facebook friends to a minimum! I tried to keep it under 200 but was like so unsuccessful. LOL. Now I'm trying not to reach 300.

July 23, 2009 12:52 AM  

MKL said...

@Nashe^, I agree. That's why I try to keep my profile low :) As for Facebook, I have like 50, sometimes I add some, sometimes delete. People will soon realize that less is more.

July 23, 2009 1:10 AM  

TalesOC said...

I only have about 50 on my Facebook as well. I try to keep it down to people I want to actually communicate with on a regular basis. If I just want an audience, that's what my blog is for.

As for the wanna-be celeb blogger incident, reading the majority of the comments was like watching a monkey fuck itself with a banana while eating a dildo. It just didn't make any damn sense whatsoever. I feel bad for them, because they're morons and don't even realize it.

I recently made my blog more anonymous as well, even going so far as to change the URL/posting name. I feel that this gives me greater liberty to post my opinions without fear of public of governmental backlash. (Ya, I live in a place like that). I've got a list of things I want to blog about and I'm cooking up some good stuff. In the meantime I'm just keeping the blog active with random silly photos and short posts.

July 23, 2009 1:51 AM  

MKL said...

@TalesOC, Oh, I'm looking forward to those things that are cooking :) I thought you were having some lighter stuff lately, so I guess it's worth the wait. I am also running out of stuff to blog, that's why it's just very random. Well, sometimes I get a good idea, like today, and write it down. Hope more things will come to my mind.
As for that incident, I couldn't describe it better, haha.. Monkeys are good for comparisons :)

July 23, 2009 1:58 AM  

TalesOC said...

Ya, my articles lately have been pretty light. It's hard to come up with something brilliant to say every day. I've had some good ideas. I keep writing them down. I just haven't managed to get into that writing mood. You know what I mean? Where the ideas just sort of jump out on their own. I'm impressed by people that come up with great, intelligent things to blog about every day, but those people are few and far between. In fact, the only blogs I've seen with good updates every day are group blogs with lots and lots of contributors.

Speaking of that, Jerine invited me to post to her Cupcake blog. It's a group blog about desserts. Not sure I want to, unless she doesn't mind my double posting. I'm greedy with my hits. O_o

July 23, 2009 4:49 AM  

MKL said...

@TalesOC, there's no international jury to keep an eye on what's good and what's bad. I could write about bags and higheels and some girls would really like the post, while guys would probably be bored with it. You can't always write something that would have all the people react excitingly. I just write what I want... I know sometimes I write crap... well, who's perfect all of the time? :) At least I acknowledge it, unlike some other 'bloggers' (you know who I mean), who think their trash is awsome.

Well, Cupcake blog? Sorry, budy, not my cup of cakes, hehe.. If that's something you can relate to, go for it.

July 23, 2009 4:54 AM  

Jerine said...

i think i know the reason why u appear anonymous

July 23, 2009 6:45 AM  

MKL said...

@Jerine, yes, you know :-)

1 because you came to my old blog
2 because we chat
3 because you read the article above
4 because you are the Queen! ;-)

July 23, 2009 6:49 AM  

The Demigoddess said...

I always spark controversy...

but only about myself. I guess my blog is just full of self-aggrandizement.

Anonymity affords you with more freedom to speak out. Strong opinions come at such a high price but someone's gotta voice them.

July 23, 2009 7:07 AM  

MKL said...

@Demigoddess, each of us has something to say what's on his/her mind. Some focus on their inner world, some on the outside world. That's why we have such a good variety of blogs. And I don't really feel controversial. These were just minor occurences and I don't plan to be controversial. I wrote about things that somehow surprised me...

July 23, 2009 7:15 AM  

Yvonne Foong said...

Hello MKL. I salute who can blog honestly even if their views are unpopular, and take any comments with stride. I have been a big chicken. People are extra critical of what I write because I am asking the public to be charitable towards me at the same time. So even though I do not think we need to compromise, it gets the better of me over time. Maybe I should try and relax.

July 23, 2009 6:49 PM  

SP said...

Hi, for a bohemist like me it was obligatory to read your blog :) I like you want to be anonymous. We all in the world (Me too) give too much informations about us, but at the end nobody know what really we are. I will follow your blog, interesting. PS: Sorry, my English is so bad. CIao, Italo.

July 23, 2009 9:48 PM  

MKL said...

@Yvonne Foong, you should try and relax and don't mind what other think. You can never satisfy every person, you will never write a post that will be liked by anyone. You have be true to yourself, you have to be the 1st person who likes her post and then come others. Good luck! :)

@SP, Ciao, come stai? Io parlo italiano, pero solo un po' :P Better in English. Yes, always be careful what info you post online, you never know who can use it against you one day.
Thanks for following.

July 23, 2009 11:33 PM  

Nashe^ said...

I didn't expect to understand your italiano up there but I did! XD

July 24, 2009 12:28 AM  

MKL said...

Italian is so easy! You don't twist your tongue like in French and I can understand Spanish and French as well. You are molto intelligente, Nashelina. I only expect the best from you :)

July 24, 2009 12:29 AM  

Anna said...

My blog is mostly my very random and fairly lighthearted rants about anything, everything and nothing, so I haven't been the target for hateful or spiteful comments. I probably give too much away as to who I am and even the area where I live, and perhaps this isn't such a great move. Then again, my blog doesn't seem to upset anyone so I guess I'm not too worried.

Really glad to have discovered this blog though, just read a bunch of posts and really like it, so adding you to my blog roll and will no doubt drop in here on a regular basis.

Anna

July 24, 2009 5:04 PM  

MKL said...

@Anna, Thank you. I feel somehow flattered, because your blog is one of my favs. I been following you a while and I like your blog for what it is: Your personal stories, thoughts and musings.
As for the anonymity. Well, it's always good to google your name or blog name and see, if there's anyone writing about you. Sometimes we think we don't step on anyone's toe, because we have good intentions, but it happens, because there's a lot of sickos out here... well, that's how I see it.

July 24, 2009 5:26 PM  

rinaz said...

Hey MKL,

To me, be in on the internet or in real life, you cant please everyone. So, just might as well say and write what you really believe in.

Winston Churchill once quoted “You have enemies? Good. That means you've stood up for something, sometime in your life.”

I have my fair share of criticisms in the blogging world. It was upsetting then. Maybe I can hypothesize and debate as to the reasons why, till the cows come home. But to me, I'd rather pay more attention to my friends than those who don't give a damn about me.

Its better to get over it.

Life is too short to bother with high blood pressure.

July 24, 2009 8:38 PM  

MKL said...

@Rinaz, I like that quote.

I wonder what which of your posts were upsetting. U can tell me the story via mail. I'm curious :)

I'm usually not focusing on these people, but I do care about issues, be it politics or scandals, I like to write my opinion. And for some people it's too much, if someone has an opinion and good arguments. Well, people online are bolder than in real.

July 24, 2009 9:28 PM  

Michelle Chin said...

That blogger must be me. :)

July 24, 2009 11:01 PM  

MKL said...

@Michelle Chin, no, it's not you at all, Michelle ;-)

July 24, 2009 11:13 PM  

The Horny Bitch said...

Assholes? I get A HELL LOT of them.

July 25, 2009 7:51 AM  

MKL said...

@HB, well, you probably have a very graphic name that attracts them :)

July 25, 2009 3:27 PM  

A Gust of Wind said...

well, we all wanted to be anonymous because we have our own live. I for one, keeps secret in my blog and I don't want my friends to find out bout it.. it's best kept secret

July 30, 2009 12:56 PM  

MKL said...

@A Gust of Wind, I think anonymity is as important as being known. It's up to the individual to chose what form does serve him best.

July 30, 2009 6:20 PM  

bagObonerz said...

ive always been a sucker for mystery. well everyone has a right to be anonymous if they want to be. sometimes its best that way. we all have our friends already, if you discover new friends online thats fantastic, then it would be safe to get into the personal aspect of it. you have no obligation to be transparent all the time. this is your blog and people has to respect what you have to say. if they dont agree with you, they can say what they want but not to the point of being an ass about it. its like someone letting out a big fart, you can either stay or flee. if you prefer to stay, dont complain and say, fuck man that reeks.

August 9, 2009 9:39 PM  

TalesOC said...

But sometimes there's no choice, and you can't leave, and then you tell the person it stinks. Like... in an elevator.

August 9, 2009 9:49 PM  

MKL said...

@bagObonerz, yes, I like anonymity, but not beacuse I wanna behave like an ass and stir controversy, trash people or what not.
If I like someone, we follow each other on Twitter or FB, where I am less anonymous, to others, I prefer this way. For now.
Then again, if you ransack my blog, you can find some stuff about me, like my real name and stuff. So no personal blog is really anonymous. I just don't want expose myself in photos and personal information. It takes 1 hater to turn your life upside down.

August 9, 2009 9:49 PM  

bagObonerz said...

its up to you if you would let a hater affect your life. there is more wisdom you will find by reading stories of people who came out of very miserable situations and emerged as a source of strength for others. this blog wars are nothing my friend. dont read trash because germs thrive in it.

August 9, 2009 9:59 PM  

MKL said...

@bagoboners, I don't read trash, believe me :) And no hater affects my life, because when I switch off my lappy, I am in real world, where cyber bullies fade like a flower in a desert. Instantly! :)

August 9, 2009 10:07 PM  


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