Starting over, again
History repeats itself. Yep. I broke up again. This time me and my girlfriend, now already my ex-girlfriend, both agreed on it. It's funny... When we broke up last year, that was the initiating moment to start this blog (here's my first post). But this time is different. This time is serious. A year ago was a big shock, because I didn't expect something like that. It came out of nowhere. Now I sensed something like that's coming up and partly I was also thinking to break up myself. But I wasn't strong enough. I wasn't sure enough. Well, now it's done. I need to accept it. And I need to get over it. It was never the same since last years break up. We were single over 3 months before we came back together. I took her back because I loved her, even after she hurt me. I tried my best to make it work, but I saw it got harder and harder. Sometimes I wasn't like I used to be and she felt that. I was sometimes very moody and unsecure. It was hard for both to continue like that. We knew that. And while being in Malaysia, it was still mostly ok, we had a great time. And I'm sure we both won't forget that. Her family loved me and I loved them. All the nephews and nieces called me uncle Nino, hugged me. It was a touching moment when her 2 years old niece said 'Uncle Nino, I love you.' I will always cherish these moments. I am still lucky to experience so many unforgettable moments with her. Thank you, 慧凊。
9 KAFKAESQUE COMMENTS:
Extra hard to break up with someone when you have ties to their family as well.
May 12, 2009 1:44 AM
Yep. That's why she can't tell them for a while. She would face too many questions and even anger, I guess. It's sad... but it is what it is.
May 12, 2009 1:48 AM
Man I kinda been there before. When something happens, you get back together but it just isnt the same anymore...
Sometimes no matter how hard you try things just cant go back to how they were..
May 12, 2009 10:02 AM
I agree. Because you ask yourself why? Why break up with me and then wanting me back? I saw how we changed after that. We both had some great moments, but we argued more. It just wasn't as pure and reckless as before. It made me unsecure and pondering over every suspicious move. That's human nature, I guess.
May 12, 2009 4:16 PM
I can agree with Prometheus on that one. Sometimes something happens and it permanently damages a relationship.
One of the most important aspects of a relationship is trust. When you get to the point where you don't completely trust the other person, you're always suspicious, always wondering. That's a hard wound to heal too. It takes years, and really, I can't see it happening long distance. I tried before in person and it didn't work.
Well, things will get better. This just gives you reason to visit Asia again Nino. You have to find yourself a new woman.
May 12, 2009 4:32 PM
I totally agree with you on 'trust'. I'm someone who would never tell a woman do this or don't do this, don't go out with him or her. I always trusted her. When she broke up last year, my first thought was she must have met another guy. She always denied that. So, i had no proof, but a suspicion was always there. Until this year, I guess. And I did change. Before I was fine if she went to the movie witha male friend, recently I was jealous and uneasy about it. I learned a lot about myself through this experience.
Regarding Asian women. Sure, I hardly imagine not to be with one, but it's hard. Unless I become an expat like Prometheus and live somewhere in Asia, then yes, of course. But I hardly see that happen. I won't think about other women now, I kinda wanna be free for a while after all the problems. But traveling to Asia is on my to-do list, yea.
May 12, 2009 4:47 PM
Isn't it mad? Being jealous is only counter-productive from my experience. Being jealous just says: I doubt if my personality is good enough for her. And self-doubt is the opposite of self-confidence, one of the most important traits women seek in a man.
Wish You all the best and keep on going ;)
May 12, 2009 5:30 PM
Follow in my footsteps sonnny :P Life the Tokyo dream lol!!!
May 12, 2009 5:30 PM
@Prometheus, if I have few thousand bucks, you'd seem me walking around Shinjuku on friday :P I may find you and buy you drinks just to be your friend ^_^
@Junjie, I wasn't like some people who are madly jealous, more like mildly, more like uneasy. Jealousy is 'lack of trust' by definition. And after someone breaks up and wants you back, it's hard to regain the trust fully. I got over that issue a while ago, but it didn't work out for other reasons. Thanx for your comment. I appreciate.
May 12, 2009 5:35 PM
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